News and views from an unique perspective

Stop blaming the government and start controlling your own destiny!

Posted by temasektimes on August 15, 2012

Instead of looking at our own failures and assessing ourselves from within on the basis of what we can do to change our lives for the better, we assess damages on the basis of what the government & the foreigners did to us, blaming our “helplessness” on outside factors.

“Chronic complainers” about the government” rant that if only the government’s policies would only change, it would make their lives more tolerable. This forms the basis of “self- victimization”: that is, when bad things happen because of lack of responsibility for one’s actions, the outside world is to blame.

The “victim” thinks that the government & the foreigners got him into this “shit”, so they owe them him a living. This mentality derails him from personal responsibility for his own growth and direction. Unless you’re physically or mentally handicapped, you have the free will to empower yourself & confront reality for what is, instead of what you wish it were.

You may not like what the government has designed for you, because the government’s design is never perfect. Some people will inevitably be left behind. That is part of a Darwinian truth : “Survival of the Fittest”. You are the own designer of your life, and taking ownership of your life, you get caught up in a cycle of “learned helplessness” whereby the government & corporations inevitably make the decisions for you, thereby guaranteeing no growth on your part, if you just choose to blame them.

You yourself make the situation even worse when you continue to feel “victimized” and that you can’t take care of yourselves, and you blame the government for not taking care of you. If you keep on rationalizing your victimization and keep finding reasons to blame the government why you can’t succeed on your own, you are not doing yourself any good but just sabotaging your own life, that’s all. If you keep allowing yourself to feel victimized by the government’s “flawed policies”, your behavior becomes second nature and prevents you from ever rising above your limitations.

The problem is that as we are now living in a global world of intense competition, you can no longer afford to feel “self-victimized” nor keep blaming the government for your situation. You have to confront & control of your own destiny, or else you won’t ever like whatever policies the PAP makes for you anyway.


*The above was first posted as a comment on The Temasek Times.


43 Responses to “Stop blaming the government and start controlling your own destiny!”

  1. Jack said

    yes, please vote wisely in the next GE, Change is coming, jack ng

    • Ah Meng said

      Let’s face it.

      There is unequal competition between the foreigners and citizens because the foreigners can afford to work at a much lower salary as they have every intention of going back to their low cost country.

      The cost of their bungalow back home is just a fraction of what we pay for even a 3 room HDB flat.

      Further when they are here, they are without their families and know that they can be send back anytime, so they try to put in as much overtime as possible.

      The want to make their little fortune as quickly as possible.

      Singapore is our home.

      There is no way that we can be expected to compete with the foreigners on who can work for the smallest wages or who can put in the maximum number of overtime.

      Are we supposed to close our eyes and compete with these foreigners in 3rd world working conditions.

      I can if our elite politicians will accept 3rd world politician wages as well.

      Please ignore the baseless arguments of these running dogs.

      What we need is a different environment where we can compete on an equal footing.

      Minimum wages would be a step in the right direction.

      And for that to happen, we need change.

      Vote for change in 2016 or expect your standard of living to fall even below that of most 3rd world countries.

  2. Lim said

    The sublimal message from Fahren is “we can change our lives for the have the free will to empower yourself & confront reality for what are the own designer of your life, and taking ownership of your life; you have to confront & control of your own destiny” So what he is saying is come 2016 you can break free from all the policies that hurt you like expensive housing, indiscriminate immigration, demand all your CPF $$ back at 55, reduce those overpaid cats’ pay another 50%, and dismantle all the money sucking monopolies, COEs, ERPs, etc. I hope that is the true intent of Fahren’s comment and not another scolding session to peasants for being complainers, moaners and whiners.

  3. ChuiGongLumParSong said

    Well…I suggest we do both…we improve ourself and control our own destiny but, at the same time…Blame the government! We SHOULD NOT let this government get away with what it has done to Singaporean!

    • Basil Meng said

      “I am often accused of interfering in the private lives of citizens. Yes, if I did not, had I not done that, we wouldn’t be here today. And I say without the slightest remorse, that we wouldn’t be here, we would not have made economic progress, if we had not intervened on very personal matters – who your neighbour is, how you live, the noise you make, how you spit, or what language you use. We decide what is right. Never mind what the people think.”

      Prime Minister Lee Kuan Yew, Straits Times, 20 April 1987

      • P Koh said

        Totally agree that LKY had done well for us the People of Singapore. Those hard and tough measures and policies which went through the economic upheavals at that time produced the result that the government had the foresight to address. Thanks to the old guards and we appreciate it. But here the environmental and economic landscapes have changed and ‘Change’ must come when policies of yester-years are not working well and are causing problems for the populace. Without change to reverse the negative effects of wrongly implemented policies, the country will decay in no time and should and must be corrected with a measure of priority. Hope that the promised ‘White Paper’ can be dished out sooner rather than later.

  4. icefire said

    stop blaming the PAPaya ???
    pls state ur nationality ???
    if u dont want to see what others complain feel free to skip that portion.
    stop blaming the locals complaining what we feel if u feel the complain is unfair go ahead to sue the media 🙂

  5. JeoJeo said

    when government ‘designed’ something, it’s usually not for us.
    they engineered the influx of ft-sg, not really for the benefit of the population’s majority.
    the key beneficiaries are the biz owners, and the bigger biz benefited much much more, exponentially (economic of scale)
    small biz owners has quota constrains, only slight cost benefit, with lots of admin hassles

    ask yourself, who are the owners of the big corporations? most of them are owned by Temasek holdings (th)
    who are the board members? many are pappies mp
    many sg listed companies has pappies-linked directors / board members

    why is th competing with sg people? like a big sucker wanting to gobble up every thing that is profitable, what is left for us?

    next biggest beneficiaries is the pappies… fresh voters who just received their pink ID, are extremely grateful to these pappies
    pappies has given up on expecting us to continue to vote them in, the lax ft-sg policy speaks for itself.

    when the government is in power for too long, lots of problems will inevitably sets in…
    look at Egypt and several middle east nations, things has became intolerable with the old time government, and pple needs the change.
    it was rough and it hurts, even till now, but pple are willing for that change, nevertheless.

  6. justice bao said

    I am amused.Really !Because this article came just a wee bit late.Perhaps by a couple of thousand years.You see,ever since when man,and woman of course,decided to farm instead of hunt than he or she became a part of a society.And in any given society the norms dictates over individuals.And what is norm is again a collective decision.Make no mistake,that’s how the card is cut even in an animal society–where the hierarchy of pecking order prevails over life and death.

    Rephrased,if PAP decides 75% of our population must remain ethnic Chinese at any cost than the end result is you get PRC in Serangoon Road banana leaf reasurants.If that is further extended than PRC will soon flip pratas.I don’t think I can make it any simpler than this example how a government’s policy rules over your individuality and life.

  7. dan said

    i would never have blamed the government if they had not forced me to serve the 2 yrs of national service and 10 yrs of reservist.
    Give me back my 2 years of life !

    • Citutt said

      If not becoz of the reservist i may create a spore record of man having the longest hair…how to control my destiny when every year i was forced to sacrifice my hair…

  8. Citutt said

    You are right fahren.we will control our destiny by eliminating pappies from making any policies for us after 2016….

  9. P Koh said

    We all know that Singaporeans are a Complaining Society – blame everyone, everything but not oneself. Also we must not forget the KS, KS and KS branding of Singaporeans Kia Si, Kia Su and Kana Sai. Let us focus on Solutions and not Problems and things will soon be looking up.

  10. notAproudSingaporean said

    He’s living a good life here with no apparent reason to complain.

  11. Sense&sensiblity said

    Ask the rich would to give away one month of their salary to the poor.

  12. Sense&sensiblity said

    Put up a challenge.The rich could consider donating one month of salary verse a normal person to the poor.

  13. Anson Be said

    control our own destiny,when pap tells you to have babies etc etc,the only control is to vote pap and yes, we can keep quiet abt it, but do it collectively come 2016

  14. crappy said

    problem is most of us don’t agree. Not just some

  15. Ben said

    most parents today leave everything about their child to the teacher. in the same way, they leave everything about their country to the govt. and if something goes wrong, they will talk so much aka complain. I’m surprised that singaporeans dun turn around and ask themselves this: what have i done for Singapore? the least u can do is to help out and contribute when asked and dun shrink back into your hole. that being said, we are not helpless. come 2016, think wisely what has PAP done then and vote whoever can make a better singapore. dun vote PAP because 60% are voting PAP. no1 owes us a living, our lives are always in our hands. u can blame the govt for whatever flawed policies but ultimately how much u earn, how society turns out are in our own hands. its like some1 that commited a crime and blames his parents for not bringing him up properly. however, remember that He has to go to jail no matter who is to be blamed, not his parents. no matter what policy changes the govt implements doesnt change the fact that we have to work for $ and work with the right attitude for the company to keep u in employment.

  16. Steve said


    Why are you taking it negatively that the negative comment in TT is blaming the Government Policy, we are protesting unhealty policies and we had started controlling our own destiny since last election, for our better future living in Singapore.

    Hence we start to voice our disagreement and let the government know our voice.

    You got it dude.

  17. S'porean also Aust PR said

    I dun blame anyone, not even the govt, opp parties or 60.1%.
    I only blame myself why I only become a quitter now.
    Lucky be late than never, I will be starting a new life out of S’pore very soon…

  18. To be fair said

    Agree with Mr “Talk Cock Sing Song”, we shall now pave our own destiny.
    Let’s be united in the year 2016 and sack the PAP !
    Without doubt, this party grows the economic pie (at our expense) but never shares it, thinking that it could pacify us by occasionally throwing some coins into our beggar bowls while they take the millions.
    Enough of wayang kulit.
    We’ve been suckers far too long.

    • Overseas Singaporean said

      It’s too late to wait until 2016 to take action… I mean, right now, almost 40% of our population are foreigners, and who knows how much more will the figure jump in the next 5 years! Boycott places which aren’t abash of using low cost foreign workers (hrmmm… NTUC), or foreigner-owned e.g. hawker centres (esp. obnoxious FTs who think we owe them a living). Stand up to foreigners when they are blatantly breaking the rules or disturbing social balance. If every Singaporean unites and do their part in their daily lives, it would become a trend, it would hit the news, and then foreigners will give second thought about working in Singapore, and maybe push some of the existing ones out of Singapore. PAP knows what we are thinking. Just that they act ‘blur’ so no one can ever know their strategy in thwarting our every move, every action. PAP has such great and powerful influence. Who do you think would triumph in the end? Just sitting on your ass and ‘wait’ until 2016 isn’t gonna work.

      Mod’s note:

      And don’t forget the PAP has its ‘B’ team to count on for support in the event of a freak election.

      “If the PAP fails to win a majority in the next GE, the Workers Party will form a coalition govt with it to keep it in power.”

      – WP MP Pritam Singh, May 2011

      • S'porean Quitter said

        I second your view. Yes, it may be too late by 2016 as the damage has been done.
        We just missed the opportunity in 2011 as 60.1% thought otherwise.
        I only became a quitter after GE2011 and glad that I have been given the quitter certificate to settle in Aust.

      • Snoopy Says said

        I don’t get it. If what u kept hi-lighting is true, then why the constant bombarding of WP since u r on PAP’s side? If WP win and it means PAP wins as well, why so agitated?

      • S'porean also Aust PR said

        Yes, I share your view, by then 2016 may still be quite the same.
        We should act now to be a quitter, our destiny is in our hands, why leave it in the hands of pap govt or 60.1%?

        Mod’s note:

        Nothing will change in 2016 because the PAP’s ‘B’ team will come to its rescue in the event of a freak election:

        ‘If the PAP fails to win a majority in the next GE, the Workers Party will surely form a coalition govt with it to keep it in power.’

        – WP MP Pritam Singh, May 2011

  19. alex said

    U dumb of cos they owe us a living . They replace us with foreigners after people hv vothem for years n we make the country economy grow n pay them millions of dollars but what did they do now…. They dig the rich n they buried the poor. U really blind idiot!

  20. Terry said

    To me it all stems from the attitudes of Singaporeans in general, where personal accountability and just plain common sense seem to be in very short supply. In Singapore, if your life sucks, it is NEVER your own fault!!

    • stop being daft said

      You are obviously totally ignorant about the realities in Singapore.

      I find ignorance and unenlightenment not in very short supply in you.

      Please refrain from commenting about Singapore if you are absolutely clueless.

  21. Fahren said

    There is no doubt that there are people who are hurt by influx of foreigners & rising prices, and that many people genuinely need help. It is all about how we try to cope with it. Pessimists focus on events that are out of their control, while optimists make do with whatever they can control. Once you start believing that you are not in control and everything that is happening to you is not your fault, then you become your own worst enemy. As Singaporeans, instead of leaning on our government and blame everything on “the man”, we should have the attitude that we control our own destiny.

    So the faster we get over it and move forward, the better it is to our personal sanity.

    • most are daft said

      Go read up Dr Chee Soon Juan’s latest book – Democratically Speaking. It may change your view of not blaming the govt.

    • Pussy Rules said

      I can bet Fahren is still single and do not have much experience in life even if his married his Not eaten much salt yet. Grow up and see weather your children can survive with 50years of housing repayment and HDB prices soar up more than a million. See that your children can get a job of more than 10K per month without fighting with those FT.

      You vote for a party to your advantage. Yes you must be responsible of your own life and it’s true. If you vote for a gorverment that go against you than why the hell you vote them for. Did you know before they get voted in, they told you that they are our servant….did you know that?!…and now it’s the other way round.

      You can buy a HDB house at a cheaper rate than why the hell it’s so damn fucking expensive now. Is it because of your own irresponsibilty that the house price is expensive.
      HDB house can be a citizens only place for shelter. If you do not want citizens to abuse it. Than change the policies. Don’t let citizens sell it or you can’t buy another. It’s that simple. If you got the means than go private housing to buy and sell. But by now it’s already too late to lower the price. Did you know that the price in Tampines is already touching $800k….who’s fault is it? If the goverment did what they suppose to HDB flats won’t raise exorbitantly.

      You vote for a party to represent the people. Know what the mission is. If we all are responsible for all the situations than why the hell you are paying millions to them. Fahren you are saying that you agree with paying millions for all those craps policies.

      Can I pay millions to OBAMA instead after all his a Damn superb foreign talent.

    • leo said

      If we are in N Korea, your comments make alot of sense. But we are not, and since the old fart and son claim spore is a democracy, then it is every citizen’s right to make them accountable for all their screwed up policies, taking into account they have recited the pledge publicly and hold them to it.

      “So the faster we get over it and move forward, the better it is to our personal sanity”

      Are you implying sporeans who grumble constantly about govt policies are now showing signs they are crazy or insane ?
      Can you elaborate further what you mean by “personal sanity”
      Because so far I can only recall 2 colleagues out of 20,000+ who face this issue.

      Perhaps you can tell us a little bit about what you do for a living.

    • 1 said

      The “noises” you hear are Singaporeans’ attempt to control their destiny. You are obviously a pessimist, ” make(ing) do with whatever (you) can control ” ). Fahren, We should make things happen! Be proactive. Be loyal. Stand up and be counted! Make Singapore a better place for every Singaporean!

  22. Fahren said

    Singapore will lose its way if citizens are too focused on the issues regarding the influx of immigrants & foreign workers. Our point of reference should be what’s going in the global marketplace, & not just inside the city-state. When you look at Singapore from the outside in, you can stay aware of the changing global landscape, and how we, as a nation, cope with it. The paradigm shift is not just from” top-down” approach to “bottom-up”, but from “inside-out” to “outside-in”. An inside-out perspective is “Singapore is our birth-right, why should we be competing with these FTs in the first place?”. An outside-in perspective is “We seek to understand the global landscape we’re in, and we shall confront the reality.”

  23. ASDF said

    Less FT!
    More jobs!
    Higher pay jobs!
    Easier to afford housing!
    Gets married at younger age!
    Higher fertility rate!
    More babies!
    Less FT!

  24. Christopher said

    @Fahren – Stop blaming the government and start controlling your own destiny

    it is easy to say, but hard to do. I just read the title and I thought its enough to justify what I am about to say in the following 3 paragraphs.

    First of all, “start controlling your own destiny”, how do you control it, mind sharing? Can I not pay ridiculously high taxes and bills, can I not buy a car without COE (another piece of ridiculously overpriced crap) and drive it on the road without getting into trouble with the government? Since i strongly believe that I am not destined to feed the people at the top, I assume? So, what destiny are you talking about? What are the things that we can do to change our destiny?

    Secondly, “stop blaming the government”, it is natural that with great powers come great responsibility, when you do badly, you have to endure the flak. Besides, the troubles that we are in right now, is it caused by our destiny or failed policies? So you are saying that we should not blame anyone but ourselves that we had to abide by failed policies? May I know which century are you from? Sure not 20th or 21st.

    Let’s just say that you got assaulted by me today, then I told you, “stop blaming me and control your own destiny. It’s your destiny to be assaulted by me today” just what kind of flawed logic is that? If I screwed up, I should admit it, same for anyone else, including the people at the top.

    Lastly, the thing that upsets me that most is that you may have gotten the points right, but do you have any solutions? Lets get practical, solutions are the only thing that is useful whenever there’s the problem. There’s no point criticizing fellow Singaporeans, calling them ‘self-victimized’ people when you can’t find a solution for them. Zero contribution to the society, other than being another piece of propaganda article, I personally do not find any usefulness in your article. I can go on and on talking about great philosophies and reasoning but that would serve no purpose in solving the problems of my fellow Singaporeans.

    • Fahren said

      Companies are inherently designed to squeeze as much out of you they can get away with. It’s in the nature of corporate business, even the good, well-intentioned employers. There is no doubt that this can be daunting, because you might be saying, “Bloody hell, Fahren! Cars & houses are so expensive, government bring in all these foreigners. Now you are telling me to stop blaming the government & control my destiny?” And I understand, how that can be daunting. One of the reasons why you might feel suffering is that we are surrounded by people who seem to be doing much better than you, you find it unfair, be it the high salaries of MPs, or the affluent foreigners. But my point is, the small things in life matter, if you care to fine tune your definition of quality living .

      Controlling your destiny doesn’t mean dramatic financial breakthrough. With the smallest investment in the right places, you better appreciate the small delights in your life.

      My brother Henry, & his wife Yvonne, take turns to pick up their son & daughter, Jonathan & Cheryl, at the school gates, & walk together with them home. Along the way, Henry will joke with them, sometimes buy something to eat or drink & they share it together. He hasn’t done anything spectacular like bringing them to Disneyland, or bought them Xbox, but the kids love him very much & make very touching cards during his birthday & Father’s Day, to say how much they love him.

      I think a more thoughtful and balanced definition of life doesn’t require a lot of money to achieve. Henry has read this article, & being a lower middle income earner with two kids to raise, he says that he TOTALLY agrees with me. Rather than taking stock of your so-called “miserable existence” in Singapore, you need to be realistic. Designing a quality life doesn’t necessarily require spending lots of money. I’m past 30, & my current salary is SGD1,600 per month & i don’t own a car neither. But i don’t believe in angering yourself over all these external circumstances, I think constructing a quality life within your current means, & preserving your sanity is more important than anything else. I think you can go further & gain more mileage in life this way, than the wishful thinking that a change in government will make your life more tolerable.

      What i mean by controlling your destiny, is to design your outlook in life, such that you celebrate what is good in life. There are lots of wonderful people (friends/family), places & experiences around us, if you care to take notice. And if you set your eyes only on those so-called “unfair” policies, then no wonder some of you are grumpy & miserable. Because it’s bad enough, not getting what you want (but don’t really need), but it’s even worse to keep moaning about external circumstances and find out at the end of it all, you are still unhappy/dissatisfied somehow.

      In fact, we have plenty to be grateful for in terms of the advances in internet computing & social networking, etc. We now have the tools & gadgets that have brought us the conveniences that our forefathers could never have imagined. Perennially complaining against the government & foreigners may bring solace & comfort to you, but once you let this behavior become second nature, it starts to prevent you from ever truly enjoying your life.

      • Pussy Rules said

        Fahren u don’t get the point of us SGrean grumbling about the gov and their policies. You want us to be contented with what we got. Yes I am contented with what I got so far and enjoying life as it is now. And that’s for the older and my generation. How about the future generation?
        If you don’t do anything about it as of starting right now, your future and and your children future can be a Hell time. Can your children in the future buy a HDB flats that cost sky high with 50years of payments? You are paying millions to your own government and you want us to control our destiny in this country. I don’t need a government in that case because I’m wasting all my taxes money. Please we are not a charitable organisation paying all those Ministers. And common people do not need $300K per month just to eat a bowl of rice with a few dishes everyday. Unless ofcourse the Ministers is saying that they feed the whole of Africa and they needed that $300K per month.

  25. jer said

    Fresh grads with no work experience expecting $3k a month …hmmmm.
    NTUC is telling older out of work PMETS, pple in their 40s With experience, that they will help find them jobs paying $2k a month…. hmmmm

  26. Ghghtxucvt said

    Theres a need fr government becos we are existing as a country. If we really can do everything ourselves, then theres no need fr government, idiot. So what are we paying them millions for? If we supposed to do this on our own, give the money back lah. No need vote. No need government. Can?

    Because the concept of government is that they are entrusted with the welfare of everyone else. If they see us as ‘victimizing’ ourselves and that they are ‘above blame’, then it totally negates the necessity of even having a government, as per your motto: Stop blaming others, start doing ourselves. That will then make them just normal ppl ripping us of our wealth while being unaccountable for all of that.

    We are ‘victimizing’ ourselves. Tsk. Forever running away from addressing the problem. ‘xenophobia’ lah. ‘complacency’ lah. Everytime something screw up, own citizens get the blame. What nonsense. We, as these ‘victims’ are always shooting to address the issues.

    And the idea of the bigger picture is getting more ridiculous. Tell me, in the bigger picture, is everybody holding and enjoying equal amount of wealth and status. Or in the bigger picture, only certain ppl are glorified and are ppl of means?

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